17 What The Fuck Moments From WWE SmackDown (24 Sept)

Monday’s edition of Raw left a lot of fans scratching their heads, after Kane turned up in his old ‘Director Of Operations’ role and proceeded to deny any involvement at Night of Champions. The waters were muddied further by his interference after the main event, in which he dragged WWE Champion Seth Rollins into a fiery hellhole. Those hoping for Smackdown to provide answers, prepare to be disappointed.

Instead we were given more Kane-based ambiguity, as well as a varied handful of matches – from spectacular high-flying efforts to uninspiring heavyweight encounters. Add a poorly-written divas segment, some comedic crowd interaction, and Booker T’s insane commentary into the mix, and we’ve got the perfect recipe for some ‘WTF’ mayhem.

Here are 17 funny, impressive, or otherwise baffling moments from this week’s Smackdown.

17. “WWE Is On Fire!”

Kane’s “split-personality” gimmick has been equally divisive with regards to the fans’ opinions. Skeptics will have been disappointed to see Kane lumber out in a suit and tie at the beginning of the show, and especially infuriated by his denial of even showing up at Night of Champions.

However, the most curious part of Kane’s promo was his assertion that he came back “because the WWE is on fire”. In quite simple terms, it’s not. Much has been made of the company’s dramatic ratings drop over the past few weeks, and the ‘Director Of Operations’ line just seems like a blatant attempt to pull the wool over the audience’s eyes.

16. The Most Obviously Piped-In Crowd Reactions

Kane ran down the night’s card as part of his opening promo, drawing suspiciously identical-sounding pops for every single mention of a babyface. Heels such as Kevin Owens and the New Day, superstars easily popular enough to earn a cheer regardless of alignment, were met with the same level of boos as Rusev.

15. He’s Fine Everybody!

Kane was eventually cut off by our glorious WWE World Heavyweight Champion, who looked absolutely fine, despite being dragged “into hell” by Kane on Monday Night Raw.

Seth seemed mildly annoyed by the Big Red Machine’s assault, but certainly not hurt or traumatised. This raises the question of why the segment even took place; it seems like pure hype-package fodder (and will surely be referenced before their probable Hell in a Cell encounter) but served incredibly little purpose.

14. “I’ve Got Some Breaking News, Guys”

Lawler did an admirable job here, putting forward the far more plausible explanation that Kane is simply playing mind games with Seth Rollins – which is surely the angle the company are aiming for. However, would anyone really be surprised if Demon Kane ran out to assist Corporate Kane at Hell in a Cell? I can just hear Michael Cole crying “Oh my! There’s two Kanes!”

13. “We Miss J&J”

Joey Mercury and Jamie Noble enjoyed the unlikeliest of career resurgences in late 2014, acting as Seth Rollins’ personal bodyguards. Unfortunately they haven’t been seen on TV since July, suplexed out of action by Brock Lesnar, and set to remain on the sidelines for an undisclosed period of time. The duo may be gone, but they’re certainly not forgotten – as this front row fan proved on Thursday night.

Given the recent spate of fan interferences at WWE events, perhaps it’s time to bring J&J back after all.

12. “That Beard’s Not Even Real”

The opening bout of the night saw Roman Reigns take on Wyatt Family member Luke Harper in a straightforward singles match. The bout was hardly the most exciting thing in the world, but did allow for this particularly inventive heckle by a member of the crowd.

While brawling with Reigns around the ringside area, Harper was subjected to a cry of “that beard’s not even real!”. No man should ever suffer allegations of facial hair falsification, regardless of how big a heel they are. We’re here for you, Luke.

11. What On Earth Is He Doing?

Cesaro’s de-push has been a heartbreaking one for his loyal legion of fans, but they certainly didn’t look any less spirited this week. In fact, they look to have expanded their budget somewhat.

Having been knocked out by Big Show on numerous occasions – a ploy to make the giant look strong prior to his clash with Brock Lesnar – the Swiss Superstar had a great chance to snap his losing streak with a match against glorified jobber Bo Dallas. Let’s see how he did…

10. Are We Watching Smackdown Or Lucha Underground?

The face team pulled off the most impressive spot of the night by some margin, executing an incredibly synchronised trio of high-flying moves to the outside. Kalisto and Neville both took to the turnbuckles and nailed a gorgeous pair of moonsaults, while Sin Cara launched himself through the ropes into a picture-perfect suicide dive.

Yes, even Sin Cara didn’t botch his spot.

9. The Cesaro Section Gets An Upgrade

Cesaro’s de-push has been a heartbreaking one for his loyal legion of fans, but they certainly didn’t look any less spirited this week. In fact, they look to have expanded their budget somewhat.

Having been knocked out by Big Show on numerous occasions – a ploy to make the giant look strong prior to his clash with Brock Lesnar – the Swiss Superstar had a great chance to snap his losing streak with a match against glorified jobber Bo Dallas. Let’s see how he did…

8. A Very Innovative Roll-Up

Predictably, the match didn’t last too long, but featured an incredibly innovative ending. Having toyed with Dallas at the beginning of the match, and survived his slightly surprising comeback, Cesaro rolled his opponent into an impressively complex pinning predicament – perhaps a throwback to his extremely technical indie days.

Describing the move is a far trickier task than I’m prepared to take on, but have a look at the image above and you’ll see exactly how inescapable a knot Bo found himself in.

7. “I Shouldn’t Have Dumped On You”

Charlotte and Becky Lynch’s babyface promo was cut short by the intrusion of Paige, who sarcastically apologised for her heel turn on Raw. Her point was clear – she feels she should have been given more credit, having started the divas revolution – but her choice of words was very poor.

Whether this particular line is the fault of Paige or those darn WWE scriptwriters will remain a mystery, but it certainly conjures an uncomfortable mental image or two.

6. That’s 8.7 On The Stephanie McMahon Scale

Natalya came to the ring in an attempt to appeal to Paige’s better nature, claiming that she should be proud of Charlotte – as proud as she herself was when Paige first won the Divas Championship. She clearly didn’t take too kindly to Natty’s kind words, responding with an incredibly loud slap to the face.

The segment then came to a strange end, as Paige simply sauntered out of the ring without any sort of retaliation from Natalya, Charlotte or Becky. There’s being a level-headed babyface, and then there’s failing to stand up for yourself.

5. Owens Steals The Spotlight

In a classic example of “throwing two feuds together” booking, Rusev teamed up with Intercontinental Champion Kevin Owens to take on Dolph Ziggler and Ryback, their respective rivals. Their alliance turned out to be an uneasy one, as Owens eventually took his belt and went home, leaving Rusev to (unsuccessfully) fend off both babyfaces on his own.

However, this was no surprise betrayal – the signs were there from the start. As Rusev stomped and posed in the middle of the ring to complete his entrance, the selfish Owens couldn’t resist sidling into frame and reminding everybody of his recently-won championship.

4. It’s WrestleMania III All Over Again

The tag match also featured a rather unlikely show of strength, which saw Dolph Ziggler lift the far larger Rusev into the air and plant him with a gigantic bodyslam.

The spot brought back memories of Hulk Hogan vs Andre The Giant – a match the announce team would surely have referred to a couple of months ago. Instead, the move probably didn’t get as big a reaction as it deserved.

3. “I’m Sick And Tired Of Them, Especially The Kid With The Trombone”

The Dudley Boyz had disappointingly minimal involvement on Smackdown this week, but did cut a brief backstage promo on the New Day. The best part of this interview was the fact that Bubba Ray didn’t appear to have bothered learning Xavier Woods’ name, instead referring to him as “the kid with the trombone”.

The promo did a good job in not only getting over the Dudleys’ desire to become 10-time champs, but also the extent to which the New Day have gotten under their skin. The Prime Time Players then showed up to wish the veterans luck, while giving a reminder that they’ll be waiting in the wings. Solid work all round.

2. Ambrose Is Shocked

Seth Rollins took on former friend Dean Ambrose in Smackdown’s main event, a match the Lunatic Fringe won in dubious fashion. Kane’s pyro went off, terrifying the champion, and allowing Ambrose to sneak a roll-up for the win.

Dean’s reaction was a very strange one. Since the break up of the Shield, he’s been portrayed as a confident (to the point of reckless) babyface, willing to fight anyone at any time. His shocked reaction to beating Seth makes no sense. The story of their recent feud saw Ambrose absolutely desperate to get his hands on Rollin – never did he see himself as inferior to the champ. Now he’s suddenly a plucky underdog, gobsmacked at gaining a cheap win over his most hated foe.

1. Your WWE Champion Loses For The Third Time In Four Days

Between last Sunday and this Thursday, Seth Rollins has lost three matches. He lost his US Championship to John Cena at Night of Champions, lost the rematch on Monday Night Raw, and lost to Dean Ambrose on Smackdown. That’s a whole lotta losing for any top tier superstar, let alone the WWE Champion.

It’s no surprise to see Rollins booked in a weak fashion these days – as has been the case for the majority of his reign – however, things seem to have taken a turn for the excessive in recent months. How much longer can he retain legitimacy before the fans’ patience begins to wear thin?